THE Andrea

6x05 Life Serial

Buffy decides that in order to take care of herself and Dawn she must get back to college and find herself a job. This all becomes much more difficult when the nerd Trio decide to present the Slayer with a series of challenges to determine the extent of her abilities. The nerd trio is Warren from the robot girl episode, Jonathan from the Superstar episode and others, and the 3rd guy is .. I dunno really. Another nerd.

Spike: (to Buffy) You're not a schoolgirl. You're not a shop girl. You're a creature of the darkness, like me. Try on my world. See how good it feels.

The first challenge the trio put towards her is this weird time warping thing. While she's auditing classes with Willow, they put something on her clothes and it causes time to move super fast around her. She finds the little device but they make it go kaflooey.

The second challenge happens when Xander takes her to work with him at his construction site. This is quite funny. All the guys Xander works with laugh at the idea of a girl helping them, until Buffy picks up a steel I-beam all by herself like it's a pillow. Then some of the guys get pissy cuz she's working too well, and making them all look bad. So, while she's working, the nerd trio launch a demon attack on her. She takes care of it, but with all the damage it causes on the work site, Xander has to fire her. She does notice a big black van outside that has the Star Wars theme as its horn.

Poor Buffy, trying to find her way in this.. her third life (remember she died in the first season too.. if only briefly). Her third test is while she's trying out a retail job at the Magic Box. The trio has it set that she will be in a loop until she satisfies a very difficult customer. After several attempts, she finally figures out a way to make the customer happy and her loop finally ends.

After her bad day, she heads over to Spike's crypt to get drunk apparently. I mean, if you're gonna get drunk, Spike is the guy to help you with that. She vents to Spike, and Spike says he thinks he can get more information his way, rather than Giles' way. So, he takes Buffy to a demon bar, where she proceeds to get way more drunk while he plays poker with some demons that may have information. They play for kittens! Poor little kitties. She sees that black van again too.

Giles gives her a big check to help with some of her expenses. She might be leaning on him a bit too much. She's not ever been on her own, so she doesn't know any better.

6x06 All The Way

It's Halloween again folks. They still think that Halloween is supposed to be a quiet night for the demonkind. When are they going to learn? After a super busy night at the Magic Box, Xander finally tells the whole Gang that he and Anya are engaged. Afterward, they decide to celebrate the engagement. Willow uses magic to decorate the house for the party and gets leers from Tara and Giles. They aren't liking her excessive use of magic lately. Especially since that dark stuff with bringing Buffy back. Tara and Willow start to argue about it, and they can't quite get to a point of agreement.

Buffy: Is that why you're always cleaning your glasses? So you don't have to see what we're doing?
Giles: Tell no one.

Dawn does the "i'm staying over at s0-and-so's house" and sneaks out to spend the rest of Halloween night with her friend and two hot guys.  When they are invited into the home of an eccentric old man, however, things take a turn for the weird.

During the engagement celebration, everyone's talk of perfect wedded bliss and kids, and all that, Xander starts to get quite overwhelmed by the idea of marriage.

Buffy heads out to go over to Spike's abode, but then Spike informs her of Dawn is out and missing. As all the Gang goes searching separately, Giles stumbles on to Dawn's friend getting neck sucked by one of the hot guys, who turns out to be a vampire. Dawn is busy getting her first kiss by the other guy, who's also a vampire. Giles finds her, then Buffy and Spike find him, and a big fight o' vampires ensues. It's really weird to see Giles take the vamps. It's kinda cute really.

The evening ends with Tara still quite mad at Willow for all her willy-nilly use of magic. So, Willow thinks she can fix it by using magic. She puts a spell on Tara to forget that they were arguing and what they were arguing about.

Also, Buffy expects Giles to reprimand Dawn for her Halloween pranks. Still relying on the Giles man a bit too much there Buffster.

As far as the monster of the week goes, it was weak. But, a lot seemed to happen as far as ongoing story with our main characters, so that made it all better.

6x07 Once More, With Feeling

Buffy, The Musical. No, not kidding. Okokok. I really love this episode. Just an FYI, all of the Buffy episodes are in 4:3 aspect ratio. That's non-widescreen for you non-video dorks. This episode is in wide screen, but the disk doesn't have it as anamorphic widescreen which really sucks. Why must they torture me so with the one episode that could be widescreen. Gah.

Anyhoo... as the episode starts, the credits look entirely different. Reminiscent of the old Bewitched show. Also, the show looks different. Like, the lighting or something. Softer focus, some vivid colors too.

As Buffy starts her patrol for the evening, she suddenly bursts into song. Say huh? Next morning, Buffy asks everyone if anyone noticed anything weird the night before. Everyone apparently experienced the sudden burst of song. As they talk about what it could be, the whole Gang burst into song. They check people outside and everyone is doing it. Meanwhile, Tara and Willow can't seem to keep their hands off each other. They then have a nice little duet themselves.

Spike: So that's all? Just come to pump me for information?
Buffy: What else would I want to pump you for? (pauses) I really just said that, didn't I?

The problem with these songs is that people seem to be revealing their innermost secrets while they do it. There's also another problem. Some people dance so much while they are singing, they simply burst into flame. Then it becomes very clear that everything isn't peachy.

Tara discovers what Willow has done with the forgetting spell, and runs off to find Willow. While Dawn is home alone, she is kidnapped by some weird wooden doll face meanies. There's this big dance number with Dawn cuz the little bit we hear her sing makes it clear that dancing is better for her. She's been kidnapped by this demon that's responsible for all the song and dance in the town. See, she's been stealing things everywhere she goes, especially the magic shop. She's stolen a particular necklace, and it seems to be responsible for the demon's presence.

Buffy and Giles are training, and while taking a break, Giles burst into song. He sings about how his presence is keeping Buffy from maturing and taking on life like she should be. Giles has sang on the show a couple times before and he has a pretty great voice. Him and Spike seem to have the best voices.

Spike finds one of those wooden pinocchio type men and they find out that Dawn's been kidnapped. Giles thinks Buffy should go alone. Once she arrives, she starts beating up on the bad guys while singing. Then the Gang shows up after all to help her, and they find out that they pulled her out of heaven and she's miserable, and she really does want something to sing about, but she can't seem to find it. She starts to dance out of control and smoke starts coming off her. As it gets worse, Spike shows up and stops her. Sings to her that she "has to go on living".

Turns out that after all is over, that Xander was responsible for all this. He was wanting to make sure that him and Anya were going to work out and thought it would just be a bunch of fun singing and dancing. Not so much there buddy.

While the rest of the Gang finish their last group number after defeating the demon, and saving dawn from evil queendom, Buffy follows Spike outside. She "tells" him she just wants to feel something, and then she kisses him as the old-school "The End" credits take us out. Oooooh. Buffy and Spike kiss :D NumNumNum

6x08 Tabula Rasa

Willow is devastated to learn that she pulled Buffy out of heaven, not hell, and she resolves to make things better by casting a spell to make Buffy forget her afterlife experience.  The spell is also meant for Tara because she has told Willow that she can't take Willow's excessive magic use. Especially after she messed with Tara's mind. Tara feels her mind was invaded and who is Willow to decide what is best for them as a couple.

Buffy: (about Spike) If I would just stop saving his life, it would simple things up so much.

The spell, however, backfires and causes the whole gang to wake up with no memories. The amnesiac Scoobies must piece together their lives and find a way to reverse the spell while dealing with the usual incursion of demons and vampires.

Coming from the MoW aspect, horrible. There's this loan shark type guy that Spike owes money, aka kittens, and he looks like an actual shark. A really bad rubber shark head on a dude acting like a gangster.

However, this still progresses the Buffyverse further, and that's never a bad thing. Once the spell is broken and Tara realizes what Willow has done... she realizes there's no hope for their relationship. When Buffy gets her memory back, she seems like she's remembering having been ripped out of heaven all over again. In the end, Buffy says she doesn't want anything to do with Spike, but her actions say otherwise. The episode ends with Tara packing her things to leave Willow, Giles flying back to England, and Buffy and Spike intensely snogging in the back of the Bronze.

We've got a new season, on a new network. Buffy moved from WB to UPN on this season. My question is WTF was WB thinking to get rid of it. That just seems whacked. Executive Twats.  Apparently it was all about money, not about ratings. Whacked, I tell ya. Now that Angel and Buffy are no longer on the same network, we don't have the crossovers we usedta.

Before I talk about the specific episodes, let me talk about this season in general. I LOVE this season. I love it so much in fact, I watched it twice. The first time I watched it, I went so fast that I had to watch 'em again to write about 'em.  Anyway, I may not like certain episodes, but I really like this season. As I've read on some fan sites and listened to some interviews on the special features of the discs, this seems to be the opposite feeling of the fans. Apparently, most people feel Season 6 was too dark. Maybe that's why I like it so much. Maybe that will tell you more about me. I guess I do tend to like dark. I am really digging on HBO's True Blood, and that is definitely dark. Like a serial killer having sex in a bomb shelter dark. It's turning out far darker than the book series it's based on too, which I'm not minding in the least. Anyhoo, maybe I just like Season 6 cuz Buffy and Spike get it on, all rough-like. Awww, sorry if I ruined that for you. It happens in episode 9, if you really wanted to know. That's on Disc 3 of Season 6.

Oh, and I also seem to cry a lot while watching this season. Maybe I just like to cry when I watch TV and that's why I like it so much. To me that seems odder than just liking the dark nature of it.

6x01 Bargaining (1) & 6x02 Bargaining (2)

It's a dark and gloomy world without the Slayer. Buffy is dead, and the Scooby Gang must do the best they can without her. But concern about the way she died leads Willow to believe that she may have been pulled into a hell dimension. Unable to bear the thought of their friend enduring eternal torment, Willow, Xander, Anya, and Tara decide to perform a resurrection spell that will bring Buffy back from the dead.

Spike: Oh, poor Watcher... has your life passed before your eyes - cup of tea, cup of tea, almost got shagged, cup of tea?

And since these things never turn out well, it doesn't. During Willow's spell, they all get interrupted by a motorcycle gang of demons that have learned that the slayer is really a robot - Buffybot. They realize the Hellmouth is open territory. The cemetery seems like an odd place to wreak havoc though. But, whatever works for the story. The gang is chased away by the demons and they leave believing the spell has failed.

But, they're wrong. She's alive, right where they left her... her coffin. She awakes, confused, and running out of air quickly. She scrambles quickly and has to claw her way out of her own grave. She doesn't realize what's going on and is stumbling around town. The town is a wreck because of the invading demons. She stumbles onto the demon biker gang, who are busy tearing the Buffybot apart. They see the real Buffy and go after her. She eventually kicks into butt-kicking mode and sees her friends. But after the butt-kicking is over, she runs away from the Gang.

Xander: Our spell. Our resurrection spell worked like a magic charm. We brought you back to life, Buffy. Right where we left her.
Willow: Oh god.
Xander: In her coffin.

The Buffybot stays online long enough to tell Dawn about seeing the real Buffy. Dawn finds Buffy at the tower where she died, and she wants to jump off of it again. Dawn convinces Buffy to not jump, and then the tower begins collapsing around them. She'may have decided not to jump, but she still doesn't seem like her usual bubbly Slayer self.

This episode certainly sets the tone for most of the sixth season. Buffy may be back, but she certainly doesn't look like she wants to be. I understand the need of this darkness. Buffy has died. How do you bring her back with a cheery Ta-Da! episode? I don't think that would be true to the show or the character.

6x03 After Life

This is really the 3rd part of the first two episodes. Weird they don't really call it that. Ok, so we start this episode with the Gang still looking for Buffy. Dawn has taken Buffy home to get her all cleaned up and dressed into her non-burial clothing. Which, let me comment on... Not really loving the outfit her buds buried her in. Seems awfully morbid and non-Buffy. But, an outfit probably isn't your main concern once your friend has died, huh? While she's trying to get used to her house again, and the fact that Willow and Tara have moved in and taken her mother's old bedroom, Spike arrives to find Dawn who he lost earlier. He gets quite the surprise when he sees Buffy walk down the stairs. At first he mistakes her for the Buffybot, until he really looks into her eyes. The look on his face was of sheer awe and love. He realizes her hands and knuckles are all mangled, and why they are that way. He tells her he's had to do the same thing, and then gives her this look, just for a moment... maybe he understands her more than anyone for that second.

The Scooby Gang arrive at her house and Spike leaves immediately. Turns out he went outside to cry. Xander and Anya start to give him crap when they go outside, and he gets angry that they didn't tell him about their plans. He reminds them that there are always consequences with magic and storms off on his new stolen motorcycle.

Looks like Spike is quite right. Bringing a Slayer back from the dead does indeed have its price. The Scoobies are being taken over one by one by some unseen spirit or ghost or something. When they brought Buffy back, apparently this demon/spirit thing was created. In order for it to stay around, it has to kill Buffy. It only appears in a spirit form, and can take over others, but does not have a form of it's own. The Gang realize they can't fight a spirit, so they have to come up with a way to get the spirit into a corporeal form.

The spirit finds Buffy, and she keeps punching and kicking the misty spirit-y thing. Bring in Willow the Witch, and poof, spirit is corporeal. Now Buffy can kick the crap out of it. With the help of some wicked weapon that Buffy keeps in her bedroom, cuz don't we all have crazy big ax things and stakes and maces in our bedrooms?

The next day at the Magic shop everyone is glad that the spirit is gone, and Buffy is still there and hasn't disappeared with the spirit she brought back. She tells everyone thanks for bringing her back, everything was so horrible where she was... boohoohoo. Then the original Scoobies all hug and bond, nut Buffy looks more depressed then ever.

She heads out to the back to be alone and runs into Spike who's avoiding the daylight in the shade. Convenient, no? They have a little heart to heart, and she admits to Spike that she wasn't in hell at all. She thinks she was in heaven, and she asks that he keep the info to himself.

Buffy: Wherever I was... I was happy. At peace. I knew that everyone I cared about was all right. I knew it. Time... didn't mean anything... nothing had form... but I was still me, you know? And I was warm... and I was loved... and I was finished. Complete. I don't understand theology or dimensions, or... any of it, really... but I think I was in heaven. And now I'm not. I was torn out of there. Pulled out... by my friends. Everything here is... hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch... this is Hell. Just getting through the next moment, and the one after that... knowing what I've lost...

6x04 Flooded

With her mother gone, Buffy finds that her months spent dead and jobless have left them without enough money to keep the house in good repair. To make matters worse, a trio of slacker sorcerers summon a demon to rob the bank for them just as Buffy is trying to get a loan.

Giles heads back to Sunnydale, and he seems very happy to see Buffy. Since I did the disclaimer earlier, I won't go through how it made me cry. Nope, won't mention a thing. However, he seems very angry and disappointed with Willow for channeling some dark magick and risking who-knows-what in the process. Willow seems like she's getting a bit too big for her britches, and actually threatens Giles for a second.

Giles: The magicks you channeled are more ferocious than anything you can understand and you are lucky to be alive. You rank arrogant amateur!
Willow: You're right. The magicks I used are very powerful. I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off.

Buffy confides in Spike again on her back porch. It seems like he's the only one she feels comfortable around.

5x20 Spiral

Buffy, Willow, Tara, and Dawn narrowly escape from Glory, but only because she is hit by a truck. Which was actually quite awesome. Too bad she just pops right back up, but as Ben now. Ben was so cute before you knew he shared a body with the creepy God chica, Glory. Since Glory knows where Dawn-the-Key is and what she is, Buffy and the Scoobies leave Sunnydale. Not only do they leave, but they leave  in an RV that Spike procures. After everyone gets over the shock of Buffy asking for Spike's help. duh he's a strong vamp dude that can't hurt the humans, they all leave town without really having any other plan.

Dawn: I think Anya's gonna try to cook. Wanna come watch the tears and recriminations?

Then, these knight-type dudes, kinda come out of nowhere. Well, we've seen their kind, and we know they are all about destroying the key, which is uncool, but still... kinda out of nowhere. And they are so old school, yo. They ride in on horses, wearing chain mail and sporting swords and other renaissance faire gear. How they manage to catch up with an RV is beyond me. I guess it's just so old and so crappy it can't go very fast. Hrmph.

They pull over at an abandoned gas station to continue the fight, then Willow breaks out her black magics to block them out. They do manage to snag the main knight guy and start questioning him. He's not terribly helpful -- kill they key, kill the key, let me kill the key. Oh, and in all this kerfuffle Giles gets wounded majorly. They are allowed to call in a doc, and they call in Ben the man-nurse. *slap da head* Eeeeediots. So, after Ben takes care of Giles, he goes all weird and "get me out of here now!", and then turns into Glory. Odd thing is no one remembers that he changes into Glory. They just think she's just there suddenly. Only person who realizes that Ben & Glory are one is Spike, but he can't even tell the rest of the Gang cuz they just keep forgetting it.

In the end, Glory wipes out all the knight guys on her way out with Dawn. Buffy goes to follow, but is delayed by Willow's energy spell. By the time it's brought down, it's too late, and Buffy can't quite deal with her failure. She plops down on the ground with a look of dazed-and-confusedness. Poor Buffy cannot get a break this season.

5x21 The Weight of the World

Despite their best efforts, Glory has succeeded in taking Dawn. This failure after so much effort proves too much for Buffy and she slips into a catatonic state. Willow must use magick to enter her mind and help her work through the trauma before it is too late to save Dawn, or the rest of the world for that matter. Once she's in Buffy's noggin, she sees her as a child on the day that Dawn is brought home as a baby. Then it shifts to her in the magic shop putting a book onto a bookshelf, looking very contemplative. It then switches to Buffy in her house, where she proceeds to smother teenage Dawn with a pillow cuz "Death is her gift", or so sayeth her spirit guide.

Buffy: I wanted it over. This is... All of this... It's too much for me. I just wanted it over. If Glory wins, then Dawn dies. And I would grieve. People would feel sorry for me. But it would be over. And I imagined what a relief it would be.

After a few go arounds of this dream/catatonia cycle, Willow starts to make headway with her. She finds out the magic shop bit is a moment Buffy had where she says she quit. She realized that everyone would be better off if everything was just over and Dawn-the-Key was gone. Death is her gift and all that. You just know she's misinterpreting that whole thing. Eventually Willow gets her out of her funky state and they go to the magic shop to get a plan going.

5x22 The Gift

Glory has Dawn, and plans to use her blood to open the portal to her home dimension, even though the portal will cause all the hell dimensions to bleed into our own. Buffy, Xander, Willow, Giles, Anya, Tara and Spike go to confront a true Hell God with the knowledge that they may not all survive. They end up using Tara to get to Glory. She's been itching to leave for some place she has to be, so they finally let her go and follow her.

First wave is Willow with Glory, she even sticks her fingers in Glory's head and Tara's head and manages to get Tara all back to normal. This weakens glory up for round two... with Buffy. Or is it? It actually ends up being Buffybot. After Glory beheads Buffybot, the next round is with the actual Buffy. They go at it... badda-bing, badda-boom. They fall from the stairs of the tower that Dawn is chained to, then Buffy goes a-wailing on Glory until suddenly Ben shows up. She leaves Ben, then Giles comes up and doesn't provide him with the mercy that Buffy did. He suffocates him. Giles kills a man! Granted, it's for the greater good, cuz Glory just ain't gonna quit, but he kills Ben. Crucial.

Buffy runs to the top of the tower, and finds that demon dude that Dawn went to for the resurrection spell. He has started the portal opening but making shallow cuts on dawn. Buffy rescues Dawn, and then it starts to "dawn" on her that she knows how to save Dawn and the world. Dawn's blood is the same as hers. She was created from Buffy. So, she gives Dawn a heartfelt goodbye, and jumps off the tower into the portal.

Buffy: Dawn, listen to me. Listen. I love you. I will always love you. But this is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles ... tell Giles I figured it out. And, and I'm okay. And give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world ... is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me.

She is suspended in the portal writhing in pain, it seems. The next thing we see is the portal is closed, and Buffy is on the ground dead. The Gang is all around her and they look at her in disbelief. Willow is a mess as is expected, but the one taking it the hardest is Spike. Maybe he does truly love her.

The next thing we see is her headstone:

Buffy Anne Summers

1981 -2001

Devoted Sister

Beloved Friend

She Saved the World

A Lot

5x16 The Body

This episode is brutal. It makes me cry just thinking about it. It's so sad. Buffy walks into her house, and she finds her mother laying on the couch dead. The way this entire episode is filmed just makes it all exponentially more brutal. The first thing I noticed is that when she calls 911 and as she's waiting for the EMS, it seems all in real time. You wait with her, quiet, her staring at the phone. Staring out the window. There's not a bit of music either. It's just the normal sounds you'd here. Footsteps, breathing, sirens. After the EMS has come and figured they can't do anything, they actually leave the body there for the medical examiner to come get. So, she is there, alone. As she's pacing the house, she stops and hurls all over the carpet. We hear that, we see her clean it up. It's all very quiet, normal, and all too real feeling.

Anya: But I don't understand! I don't understand how this all happens, how we go through this. I mean - I knew her, and then she's... there's just a body, and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore! It's stupid! It's mortal and stupid! And... and Xander's crying and not talking, and... and I was having fruit punch, and I thought, "Well, Joyce will never have any more fruit punch - ever, and she'll never have eggs, or yawn, or brush her hair, not ever," and no one will explain to me why.

It only gets worse as we see everyone else's response to the news of Joyce's death. Again with the quiet, or the tears.. just raw anguish. And man, Alyson Hannigan's crying will just rip you through your gut. I had the same issue when Oz left her. That girl can make you feel every ounce of her sadness in the way she cries. Devastating.

5x17 Forever

Refusing to accept that her mother's death is the end, Dawn becomes obsessed with using magick to bring her back. In a weird sense of helping, Spike takes Dawn to a weird tailed magician dude to get her a decent spell. They have to steal an egg from some weird monster. The monster was so weak. It seemed to not really move much. It had three heads and they wiggled around a bit. But it just seemed strange to me. Not as menacing as I think they were trying for.

Angel: I can stay in town as long as you want me.
Buffy: How's forever? Does forever work for you?

Meanwhile, Buffy is getting some consolation of the Angel-kind. They spend an evening together and it's the first time she seems to have to slowed down. But once she realizes what Dawn has done, they have a bit of a tiff. Dawn tells her she has no one, Buffy ignores her, Buffy doesn't care, Buffy hasn't cried yet. She tells Dawn she stays busy so she doesn't have to. As a zombied Joyce starts walking onto the lawn and knocks on the door, Buffy races to the door to see her mother again. But before she can open the door, Dawn ends the spell and the porch is empty when the door is open. Buffy finally gets a good cry on.

5x18 Intervention

Buffy and Giles leave for the desert on a vision quest in an attempt to find a way to fight Glory. She gets a very vague answer from the First Slayer in a weird trippy bonfire vision thingy.

While they are gone, Spike decides to have a little fun with his BuffyBot he purchased from Warren, the other dude that had the robot. The Gang mistakes it for the real Buffy and think that she has gone absolutely bonkers.

Glory: (about Spike) WHAT is that, and why is its hair that color?

After a big vamp fight with the Gang, Buffybot, and Spike... Spike and Buffybot get it on in the cemetery. Xander and Anya actually see this and feel like an intervention is in order. However, Glory has come up with the idea that Spike is the Key and kidnaps him. The Gang needs to get him or kill him or something, since he does know who the real Key is. However, Glory realizes that he's a vampire and can't be the Key. But, she can torture him to get the information. He stays solid and doesn't say a thing. They rescue him, and in a way to figure out what he has told him, Buffy disguises herself as the Buffybot. She finds out that he didn't say a thing, and he wouldn't ever cuz he knows how much Dawn means to Buffy. So, she kisses him in gratitude, and he realizes it's the real Buffy.

5x19 Tough Love

While Buffy tries to control a motherless Dawn and bring their lives back to some sort of normalcy, Tara is captured by Glory who is desperately trying to find the Key. She's just grabbing at straws it seems. She realizes that Tara isn't the key, and does her mind sucking thing on her, making Tara a looney. This puts Willow in quite a tizzy, and rightfully so. But, instead of seeing reason, cuz who would, she tries to go after Glory by herself with black magicks. She's not quite ready for something so intense and Glory quickly gets the upperhand. Buffy comes in and saves her from Glory and herself.

Glory: A girl like Buffy's got just so many friends, all I have to do is rip through them one by one until--(Ground starts shaking) Did somebody order an apocalypse?

Buffy and the Gang just can't get a break. You know they are gonna have an end of the world sort of thing going on soon... end of the season and all... but they seem like quite a mess. How are they gonna manage?

5x12 Checkpoint

Quentin Travers and a team from the Watchers Council arrive in Sunnydale with information about Glory. However, since Buffy no longer works for the Council, they decide that they must put her and her friends through a grueling set of tests to determine that she is worthy of their trust.

Anya: (Describing herself) Anya Christina Emanuella Jenkins, 20 years old...born on the fourth of July--and don't think there weren't jokes about that my whole life, Mr., because there were. 'Who's our little patriot?' they'd say when I was younger, and therefore smaller and shorter than I am now.

Buffy stresses over the whole test thing the Watchers do, but in the end comes to the conclusion that the test is really for them. She decides whether they are allowed back into her life. And man, do they kowtow to her once she realizes she has the upperhand.

Girl Power!

5x13 Blood Ties

Buffy finally tells her friends that Dawn is the Key and they start acting strangely when Dawn is around. Dawn figures out that something is wrong and wants the truth. She has seen that crazy people know that she is different, so she goes to the mental ward at the hospital for some answers.

Spike: (about Dawn) She's not just a blob of energy, she's also a 14 year-old hormone bomb. Which one's screwing her up more right now, spin the bloody wheel.

Ok, I believe I am remembering why I didn't like Dawn so much. Not that she doesn't have the reason to, but gawd she's a whiner. It gets a bit worse too as I recall.

5x14 Crush

Buffy notices that Dawn is spending a lot of time around Spike and assumes that Dawn has a crush on him. Dawn surprises her, however, by telling her that Spike is in love with Buffy. Meanwhile, a train pulls into the Sunnydale station with every passenger slaughtered by a vampire, and Buffy is finding it hard to concentrate on the investigation while simultaneously fending off Spike's advances.

Buffy: The late-night stakeout, the bogus suspects, the flask? Is this a date? Spike: A d- Please! A date? You are completely off your bird! I mean- Do you want it to be?

It was so cute to see Spike's attempts at wooing Buffy. He was wearing khakis and a pastel shirt. I'm not sure she even noticed, but I did. He's trying to be the type of man Buffy would want. It's so cute. He even finally tells her that he loves her. She finds it completely disgusting though. Instead of letting him think he has a chance, she goes looking for him to make it very clear how she feels, and stumbles onto Spike with his guest Dru. He fakes Dru out, and ends up having Dru & Buffy tied up. He tells Buffy that he is willing to kill Dru to prove how much he loves her. Then Harmony gets all whiny cuz she's not in the mix. In the end, she tells Spike she wants him to leave town. He also realizes she has revoked his invitation to her house. The look on his face when he sees that is just so hurt.

5x15 I Was Made to Love You

A strange girl arrives in Sunnydale searching everywhere for her boyfriend Warren. She is sweet, pretty, and strong enough to throw Spike through a window when he hits on her. Buffy and the gang decide that they must do something before someone less impervious to injury gets in her way and gets seriously hurt.

Buffy: Oh, no - love doctor Buffy is not in. I'm not qualified to give dating advice. I've had exactly two boyfriends, and they both left. Really left. Left town, left.

This girl was really good at being a overly happy cute robot chic. But overall, just kind of a  soso episode. But, it does kind of prep us for another episode involving a different robot soon.

Buffy talks to Ben the man-nurse and they plan on going out for coffee, but in the end she says she's not ready for coffee yet. Coffee is quite the commitment. We also see more of the whole Glory and Ben share a body thing. What is up with that? That is so weird.

After the big fight with the Robot at the end, Buffy comes home and sees her mom lying somewhat lifeless on the couch...

5x09 Listening To Fear

A Queller demon lands in Sunnydale in a fiery meteorite and begins killing all the mentally ill people it can find. Meanwhile, Joyce has been diagnosed with a brain tumor, and while she waits to undergo her operation the tumor is making her act increasingly unusual. Buffy must find and defeat the demon before it senses her mother's madness and makes her its next victim.

Riley: Oh, yeah. I'm sorry about last time. Heard I missed out on some fun.
Xander: Oh, yeah, fun was had. Also frolic, merriment, and near-death hijinks.

Ok, wow. I would have to rank this awful Alien-demon thing in the top 3 worst costume/make-up things ever. However, it was really gross no matter how bad it looked. So, I guess it was successful in that right.

5x10 Into the Woods

At the hospital, the Scooby Gang awaits news from the doctor about Joyce's surgery and they are all relieved when the surgery is a success. Dawn spends the night with Xander and Anya. With the house to themselves, Buffy and Riley spend a romantic evening together. In the middle of the night, Riley sneaks out and Spike follows him into an old building.

Spike: Sometimes I envy you so much it chokes me. And sometimes I think I got the better deal. To be that close to her and not have her. To be all alone even when you're holding her. Feeling her, feeling her beneath you. Surrounding you. The scent... No, you got the better deal.

Spike then takes Buffy to where Riley has been going at night. It's like a big junkie house for humans that let vampires feed on 'em. He tells Buffy he wanted to see what she saw in it. Yanno, cuz of Angel and that one bite with Dracula. Riley is such a woman. Bah. Now I remember why he annoyed me so. Cuz he spiraled down into pussy-dom. He gets offered a position back in the military, so he basically gives Buffy an ultimatum. Meet him at midnight where he will be leaving in the middle of some park or something, or he leaves her forever. She manages to get there just as the helicopter is taking off and he doesn't even try to look back.

Harsh episode for some I'm sure. But not for me. Ciao Bucko!

5x11 Triangle

While trying to create a new spell to help Buffy with her Slaying, Willow is distracted by an argument with Anya and accidentally releases a troll from a mystical prison. With Buffy in mourning over Riley leaving town, Willow and Anya may need to defeat the troll themselves before it flattens the entire town

Willow: Hello, gay now

Lame. Not worth more words.

5x05 No Place Like Home

When doctors cannot determine why Joyce is sick, Buffy is convinced that the cause must be supernatural. When she tries a spell to let her see magical influences, Buffy sees far more than she had planned. As she walks around in her spelled daze, she thinks she can't find anything, but then suddenly starts to see that her sister Dawn is fading in and out of all the photos in the house. She walks into Dawn's room and she sees Dawn's things fading in and out too. It flashes from a teenage girl's room, to a typical home's storage type room.

Ben: Hey! It's Buffy, isn't it? Ben... but you can call me man-nurse. Everybody else here does.

Earlier, Buffy found a strange orb at a warehouse, and goes back to check out the area. She finds a captured and beaten monk. As she tries to save the man, she's attacked by a girl she's never seen who has amazing strength and a bit of a temper. She manages to escape with her butt mostly in tact, and with the monk. The monk isn't in quite so good shape though. Before he dies, he tells Buffy that Dawn is the human form that his brethren made from an energy he calls "The Key". Dawn is not really her sister and all her memories have been created by the monk group. But now, Dawn is human and she doesn't know where she truly came from.

5x06 Family

As the gang get ready to celebrate Tara's birthday, her family arrives in town to take her back home. She resists, but her father insists that she come back with them before the family curse turns her into a demon on her 20th birthday.

I'm all for a Tara-centric episode but this one was lame, lame, and sucky.

Buffy: Nothing like getting your ass kicked to make your ass hurt.

In the end, Spike hits Tara in the face to prove that she's 100% human, which she is... and she sends her family on their way. How lame would it have been to grow up thinking you were going to turn into a demon at 20. And, really, it was just a way to keep the ladies in the family under control.

5x07 Fool For Love

When a run-of-the-mill vampire seriously wounds Buffy with her own stake, she begins to obsess over the deaths of previous Slayers. Desperate for answers, she turns to the only person with firsthand knowledge of how two Slayers fell in battle... Spike.

Spike: Sooner or later, you're gonna want it. And the second - the second - that happens, you know I'll be there. I'll slip in, have myself a real good day.

Ahhhhh, I love Spikey-poo episodes. We see him as quite the weeny in 1880 before he gets turned by Drusilla. He was a horrible poet in love with a woman that thought he was beneath her. It was quite heart breaking. As Spike recites the details of his killing two slayers, we learn more and more about him... even how he got his big coat. He ends up telling Buffy that the only thing that can hurt her is herself and the only thing  she truly has to worry about is her own death wish.

Also, Spike is really starting to swoon over some Buffy.

5x08 Shadow

Riley begins to suspect that Spike has feelings for Buffy, and Spike takes great pleasure in telling Riley about Joyce's illness -- and about the fact that Buffy told Spike first. Meanwhile, Glory is conjuring up a creature that will be able to locate The Key for her, no matter what form it may be in. But it ends up being this gawdawful cobra creature. Why didn't they learn that snake-type monsters never work for them? Gawd, it was so bad it was laughable. Yech.

Spike: Okay, how 'bout this one. Twice in recent memory, she's had the lover-wiccas do a deinvite on the house. Keep out specific vamps. Ever ask yourself why she's never taken my name off the guest list?
Riley: Because you're harmless.
Spike: Oh yeah, right. Takes one to know, I suppose. Least I still got the attitude. What do you got, a piercing glance? Face it, white bread. Buffy's got a type, and you're not it. She likes us dangerous, rough, occasionally bumpy in the forehead region. Not that she doesn't like you ... but sorry Charlie, you're just not dark enough

Riley is getting more and more down in the dumps about his and Buffy's relationship. He just feels that he loves Buffy, but she can never love him or need him the way he does her. We're basically back to this puss-fest he started at the beginning of the season.

5x01 Buffy versus Dracula

So, the vamps of all vamps is in town. That's Dracula... the Count... The Prince  of Darkness.. etcetc.  He has come to check out the Buffster and is all up in her stuff. He sneaks into her house, he gets his bite on with her, he turns Xander into a Renfield. Which is so hilarious. Seriously, Xander's best ever. Anya is seriously starstruck. She's met Dracula a few times over her big ex-demon life and she just seems so giddy at the thought of seeing him again. He's like the rockstar of vampires.

Xander: Like that's enough to fight the Dark Master... bator.

Oh, Xander's Renfield-ness is used to try to lure Buffy to the castle Dracula is staying so he can do something to her. Riley and Giles go after her, and Giles falls into a room where the "Three Sisters" get at him. If they are torturing him, he's loving every minute of it. He didn't seem so happy when Riley rescued him. In the end, Buffy dusts Dracula, sorta, like 3 times. It was quite humorous.

Oh, and in regards to our ever moving storyline, Riley seems to get very jealous of Dracula's interest in Buffy. He's starting to seem awfully "woe-is-me" when it comes to Buffy.

At the end, we are also mysteriously introduced to someone who is called Buffy's "sister". Say, wuh?

5x02 Real Me

Through her diary entries, Buffy's little sister Dawn gives her views on Buffy, Slaying, and the rest of the Scooby Gang. Though she only appeared at the end of the last episode, it now seems that she has been around since before the series started. She is in the credits like all the others, she also knows about Buffy and her destined role in life. She also seems to know about all kinds of things that have gone on. But where did she come from?

Dawn: Willow and Tara do spells and stuff, which is so much cooler than Slaying. I told Mom one time I wished they'd teach me some of the things they do together. And then she got really quiet and made me go upstairs.

I do really remember not liking the character Dawn the first time around. She doesn't seem too bad this go 'round. But we'll see. Maybe she grated slowly. We see the whole episode through her eyes. She seems very much the teenager with an older sister that annoys her. I'm sure it doesn't help that her older sister is "The Chosen One" and all that. That's gotta be hard on a gal to look up to.

5x03 The Replacement

The demon Toth fires a strange weapon at the Slayer, but Xander jumps in front of Buffy at the last moment. The blast sends him sprawling into a mound of debris, but after chasing off the demon the Scoobies collect Xander who seems to be dazed but alright, and walk him home. A few hours later, a second, very confused Xander crawls out of the debris and makes his way towards home.

Buffy: Well, if this guy wants to fight with weapons, I've got it covered from "A" to "Z" -- from "Axe" to... "Zee other axe."

The Toth demon seems to have the ability to split a persons into two halves -- their strong half, and their weaker half. I guess his intention with Buffy was to make a full Slayer half and a more normal non-Slayer half. If he kills one of the halves, both die. Smart thinking, buddy.

Since Nicholas Brendon has a twin brother, they were able to use him during the shots with the two Xander's together. That had to be quite convenient. Ohohoh! There was this one part where the weaker Xander is trying to prove to Willow that he's the "real" Xander and he does the Snoopy dance. OMG. Best thing ever. Cuz it was so accurate. I never knew a person could pull that off. Now I know, and knowing is half the battle.... ;)

5x04 Out of My Mind

The increased strength and speed given to Riley by the Initiative are starting to tear his body apart. He must be operated upon immediately to repair the damage, but that will mean giving up his enhanced fighting ability and any chance of keeping up with Buffy. Talk about hard-headedness. He doesn't want to get the surgery cuz he thinks Buffy will no longer want him if he isn't strong. Why are men so men-like? Gaw, a woman can't be stronger, or make more money, or just be bold without a man getting all pissy and pussy about the whole thing. Geeez, it's quite irritating.

Spike: (to the TV) Oh Pacey, you blind idiot. Can't you see she doesn't love you?

Meanwhile, when Spike finds out there's an Army doc around ready to do surgery on Riley, he goes and kidnaps the doc. Spike wants the doc to get the chip out of his head. The doctor keeps trying to tell him he can't help him, but Spike insists. The doc tricks him and Harmony and says he got it out only to have Spike get all zonked when he tries to hit a human again. Awwww. Spike still can't hurt the humans. Which works well for the story. It wouldn't work so well with him being fully bad yanno.

4x20 The Yoko Factor (1)

So, Angel comes into town to apologize for something he said to Buffy when she was in LA. Yah, lame reason for a weak crossover. Anyway, on his way into town, he stumbles across Buffy's latest love Riley. They have a knockdown-drag out and all that. And of course, the preternatural strongman Angel has a bit of an upper hand. Really, they should have just whipped 'em out and taken a tape measure. It certainly would have entertained me. Really, when you think about the visual of that. It would probably enterain anyone. Cuz that would just be awesome.

Buffy: If I was any more open-minded about the choices you two make my whole brain would fall out.

Freak-enstein Adam has enlisted Spike to help him with the Slayer and Scooby Gang. He needs them out of his way, and since Spike is all chipped in the head, he can't physically hurt them. Instead he turns to his wiley ways and turns each of the scoobies on each other by dropping hints and doing the so-and-so said this about you sort of thing. Might seem typical, but it works quite well.

4x21 Primeval (2)

Adam gets a hold of Riley, and gets him under control. Turns out Spike isn't the only one that has a chip in him that lets someone control him. At some point, Professor Walsh put a chip into Riley's shoulder and now Adam can control everything Riley does or even doesn't say or do.

Buffy finds Spike in Adam's cave and puts 2 and 2 together and realizes that Spike was intentionally trying to split up the gang. When she goes back and tells the team, they all realize that Adam and friends area going to attack the Initiative from the inside. It explains all the sudden activity the Initiative has seen with capturing demons and vamps. The Gang realize that can't really bring Adam down with strength, so they will have to go the more mystical witch-y route.

Xander: Spike's working for Adam?! After all we've done-- Nah, I can't even act surprised.

They raid the Initiative, get their spell on, and Buffy gets all weird with red eyes and speaking all funky and getting her Matrix bullet-time bulletproofness on. It was cool. She then punches through Adam's chestal area and grabs his radioactive power source. She says some more mystical mumbo jumbo and poof goes the radioactive material. A demon crashes in on the Gang right after they finish the weird spell for Buffy, and Spike actually save 'em all. What's up with that? I guess he's just looking to get pizzzz-aid. Buffy's estrangement from her friends and Giles threatens to keep the group from stopping Adam's plan to design a master race of human/demon hybrids.

4x22 Restless

A primal animal stalks Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles in their nightmares as they each come face to face with their worst fears.

This is a very weird episode. I don't even think watching it a second time helped. It was just weird. Granted it was all weird dream speak and all that. But damn. I know! I know! A perfect way to describe this is it was like those weird dream moments in Twin Peaks... with the short dude and the backwards speaking. Yah, it was just like that! But just add a weird dude that keeps interrupting with his cheese.

Xander: Sometimes I think about two women doing a spell... then I do a spell by myself.

Let me sum up this whole season...

It sucked... It sucked balls. It was like a schizophrenic season. I wonder if maybe they thought they weren't going to get any further than three seasons, so the fourth one baffled 'em. So, it took a whole season for them to figure it out. Cuz I'm pretty sure it gets better after this season. This particular episode was like summing up all the schizophrenia with an uber-schizo episode.

It's weird when I really break down each episode. There were a lot of episodes that were good if you looked at 'em individually, but as a whole season it just makes me want to scratch my balls.

4x16 Who Are You? (2)

Buffy (in Faith's body) has been captured by the Watcher's council's goons. She attempts to escape them, but they are quite determined to send her to England. Faith is over in Buffy's body and she's going quite nuts. She goes down to the local club, and gets silly drunk and is flirting with everyone in the bar. She runs into Spike, and gets him all hot and bothered.

Willow attempts to finally introduce Tara and Buffy to each other. But, that ends up being very awkward seeing as Faith is in Buffy's bod. However, Tara senses that something isn't right with her. Something about her aura being all in turmoil and squeeegy or something. Faith-in-Buffy actually ends up having sex with Riley. This is not going to be good for Riley.

Faith-in-Buffy: You can't do that - it's wrong - I'll kick your ass.

The demony frankenstein dude, Adam, is out recruiting vampires for his purpose of killing and stuff. His vampire buds take over a church and both Faith and Buffy arrive to stop them. Using a magical mojo thingy that Willow and Tara conjured, Buffy is able to get her body back. Faith runs off and disappears... I think we see her again in L.A. And you know what that means right? Yup, crossovah!

4x17 Superstar

First, the credits are a bit different. Random character Jonathan is inserted into them as a badass slayer-type. This kinda lets you know that something ain't quite right in Sunnydale. Suddenly, the character of Jonathan is this major popular important person. He's great at absolutely everything. Everyone goes to him for answers.

In the middle of a patrol, where Buffy and Gang are hunting the vampires and stuff, they find themselves needing bigger guns. So, obviously that is Jonathan? He's a slayer type, he's a genius, he can sing with a big band, play a trumpet, be a badass basketball player, author and relationship therapist between Buffy and Riley too. There isn't a step in life where people aren't encountering him.

Buffy: (about Jonathan) He starred in The Matrix but he never left town. And how did he graduate from med school? He's only 18 years old.
Xander: Effective time management?

Obviously something is amiss. So, there's some crazy critter that is attacking randomly. Turns out Jonathan did some spell, shocking, and this critter is basically the universe's way of balancing the crap he's done. Tsk Tsk Tsk. They finally get rid of the beast, which gets rid of Jonathan's fame, and most people's memory of it.

4x18 Where the Wild Things Are

Buffy and Riley have been getting it on quite a bit lately. I guess they got over that whole Faith-in-Buffy having sex with Riley thing. They are certainly rabbit-like. Because of this extra passionate energy, a spirit type thing of an old orphanage gets awaken in the Riley's frat house. During a big party, Riley and Buffy end up in flagrante delicto which ends up fueling these spirits more.

Buffy: (to Riley) Okay, you get Fang, I'll get Horny. I mean...

Yah, basically, lame. But, great excuse to have an episode just full of touching and sex and stuff. Way to go with the teenage sex hormone plot line.

4x19 New Moon Rising

Oz returns to Sunnydale. He seems to be all hunky-dory, and doth claims he still loves him some Willow. He also says he has his full moon issues under control. Willow even sees the control in action while talking to him under a full moon. Awww, cute. However, bet he didn't plan on finding Willow with another love connection. And by love connection I mean her lesbianic love with Tara.

Oz: This warlock in Romania sent me to the monks there to learn some meditation techniques. Very intense. All about keeping your inner cool.
Willow: Good. 'Cause you were such a spaz before.

Ooooh, that's get him all riled up again. And not in that teenage boy-lesbian-fantasy way. But in, urgh-grumble-grumble-woof-I'm-angry, sort of way. He gets all wolfy again after he smells Willow all over Tara. Now, what I'm wondering is how did Tara get all covered in Willow-scent. Are they making with the sexy-time and we aren't being informed of it? Seems like a complete lack of detail they should be sharing with us. Fer shame.

Oh, and I'm sure something lame happened with the Adam storyline. Gaw, this season just sucked balls.